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If two people were alone together in a car’s back seat, or in a bedroom, it was generally assumed that sex could follow.
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Faye Dunaway and Warren Beatty in Bonnie and Clyde didn’t discuss whether to have sex they just looked deeply into each other’s eyes and kissed as the camera panned away. S exual consent-the decision to take part in sexual activity, expressed via words and behaviour-was once largely taken for granted in heterosexual relationships. Pillay had thought an incident could only be called an assault if it matched “the cliché-if you’re violently attacked and restrained.”
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Yet Pillay didn’t think of what had happened as a sexual assault-not until her best friend suggested it a few days later. “It was all casual and cool.” But the night changed her: she felt like something about her had been contaminated. “We basically chatted like old acquaintances,” she says. When it was over, they got up and got dressed. At some point, there was intercourse-a part she doesn’t remember well. “I just kind of thought, ‘I’ll let this happen.’ I didn’t know how I could make it not happen.” She remembers the roughness of the motion injured the inside of her cheek. Suddenly, Mark pushed her head down toward his lap, saying that it was okay if they didn’t have a condom, that she could just go down on him. Pillay objected, saying they didn’t have a condom, that she didn’t want to do this there, on the sand, in the dark.